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The Argyll Arms
If you only go to one
Built 1740-42 but entirely remodelled in 1897 (the same year the Dog and Duck, was built), this Grade II-listed building stands as a monument to the opulence and quality of late Victorian pub design. The pub was made to pull in the punters and, more than a century later, it is still worth going inside to gasp at the etched mirrors, woodwork and brown-ridged ceilings that, after a few drinks, look like stalactites. The main bar curves out, allowing more people to get round and, naturally, leading you deeper into the pub; wandering between the Victorian etched glass and wood partitions that divide the bars (there used to be more, but back in 1900 magistrates insisted they went because prostitutes were using them for business) can become pleasantly confusing. But don't stop here, this pub is like a CS Lewis wardrobe; the real magic is at the back. Find the bust of Shakespeare, go up the stairs then, at the first landing, turn back and look down on the 'Gormenghasta' scene below - this is the best view inside a public in London.
Downstairs, sit at the bar and as you do, take note of the wide staff walkway behind it to enable quick service; 110 years later you still get served more quickly here than at any other West End pub of comparable size. Upstairs wander into the Palladium bar (the pub is across the road from the Palladium and many stars had an after-show tipple here in the 1950s and 60's).
Best drink It's a gin palace, so have a gin and tonic, £3.30.
When to go To see the stunning interior, visit early in the day and wander around. Better still, for a real 'Alice in Wonderland' experience go there once you've had a few ales. In all, a pub London should be proud of.
Best seat Sit upstairs in the corner nearest the door underneath the photograph of Frankie Howerd. You'll also find black-and-white portraits of Tom Jones, Michael Caine and Ken Dodd, but don't go to the tiny bar for a drink - it's table service only upstairs.
Best snack Spicy Cajun chicken flatbread, £4.50.
18 Argyll St, W1 (020 7734 6117)
Coach & Horses
This is a wine pub with a pretty good selection by the glass, but take time to look at the glass-fronted beer engines, which are branded (gold on green) with the pub's name.
Best drink Australian cabernet shiraz, £3.
When to go Nip in for a mid-evening sharpener, but remember Tuesday night is comedy night.
Best seat Sit in the corner beneath the strange mirrored cupboard (is there a TV inside? A severed head?), so you don't have to look at it.
Best snack Nachos to share (£6.25).
1 Great Marlborough St, W1 (020 7437 3282).
The Dog & Duck
Small, brilliant Victorian drinking hole. Full of whey-faced youths in the early evening, but ignore them and admire the wonderful green tile-work and the Victorian glass.
Best drink This is an ale house pub, so drink whatever the beer of the week is (it will be well kept and served). See CAMRA's choice below for the pints to look out for.
When to go To appreciate the decor, pip in for a mid-morning pint (instead of your tea break).
Best seat If packed, sit at the small bar in the George Orwell room upstairs, which is smoke-free (a bit late, considering he died of TB in 1950) and usually empty ...
Best snack ... though not at lunchtime when it's full of diners hunched over the pub's all day breakfast, £5.95.
18 Bateman St, W1 (020 7494 0697).
Carlisle Arms
The exterior of this pub features excellent faux-Georgian Quality Street-style windows, but the inside seems a unremarkable as the city it shares a name with. Great pub carpet and a till receipt that says 'Hope you enjoyed the full range of crisps/nuts'. We did.
Best drink This is a lager pub: Kronenberg, £2.55, or Stella Artois, £2.80.
When to go Popular with local office workers on weekday evenings, but surprisingly quiet on the weekends. A good place to rest after an afternoon shopping on Oxford Street.
Best seat There is a giant and obtrusive television screen tuned to Smash Hits TV at one end of the bar, so sit at the shelf table - a rare survivor in West End pubs - attached to the window on the right.
Best snack Salted peanuts, 50p.
2 Bateman St, W1 (020 7479 795).
Pillars of Hercules
The top end of Soho lacks the literary loucheness that still lucks in the heart, but Martin Amis and Ian McEwan used to drink here and it is dark enough to successfully hide in, though this makes it dingy rather than romantic.
Best drink The Young's bitter was sour on our visit (is this happening more often since the brewery's move to Bedford?), so drink water and Bell's whisky, £2.20.
When to go Head here at 7.30pm, when nearby pubs are heaving.
Best seat Walk to the end of the long, thin bar and turn left to find a round table in the corner. If you don't like smoking, this is the table nearest to the smoke free bar.
Best snack A hearty peppered steak sandwich, £3.95.
7 Greek St, W1 (020 7437 1179).
The Coach & Horses
This is still branded Norman's Coach & Horses after the legendary landlord, Norman Balon, but the old bugger's gone now and it's becoming 'shudder' a young person's pub. Nonetheless, it's largely bearable apart from the occasional advertising berk.
Best drink Drink vodka and tonic, £3.50, in memory of Jeffrey Bernard and admire the back-lit 1960s logos for Double Diamond, Inn Coope and Skol lager as you order it.
When to go For the best chance of getting a seat, go early in the week or mid-afternoon.
Best seat Sit at the bar of the bar - furthest away from the Greek Street entrance - near the toilets. This is where the Buzzcocks sit on their occasional visits.
Best snack Advertises free pies with a pint but, annoyingly, doesn't always offer the pie or explain how to get it. Norman would approve of that.
29 Greek Street, W1 (020 7437 5920).
De Hems
Technically not in Soho, but just a short stroll over Shaftesbury Avenue, this West End institution built in 1890, was quickly leased by a retired Dutch sea captain who saw a gap in the market for an oyster bar in London's glittering West End, and proved an early adopter of the theme-pub concept by plastering his walls with the discarded shells of his punters. The place quickly became a meeting point for passing Netherlanders, and was a regular haunt of the exiled Dutch Resistance during World War II.
In 1959 it was renamed De Hems in honour of the Captain (having spent its first 69 years as The Macclesfield) and has stuck like glue to its Dutch identity to this day, although it's now owned by the Mitchell's & Butlers group, which also fields the All Bar One, Nicholsons, O'Neills and Scream brands. Just as the British like to marvel at English 'pubs' when on holiday, so Dutch tourists still flock to De Hems, but this boozer is no mere tourist trap, and has a strong following among Londoners who lap up its extensive range of continental beers, from the punishing Delirium Tremens (which clocks in at 8.5 per cent alcohol) to the 'girly' beers (the barman's word, not mine) like Floris and the strawberry-flavoured Fruli. The menu, too, is doggedly Dutch, although some exotically named items turn out to be things like ham and eggs, and there is also a strong Thai theme on account of Holland's imperial past - chicken satay and spring rolls can both be found if you're not in the mood for deep-fried cheese.
Downstairs is a spacious bar with hard-wearing wooden flooring and high stools and tables, all of which testify to the fact that the placed is absolutely rammed on Friday and Saturday nights. The upstairs room, open in the evenings only, is the jewel in the crown - a large, relaxed, modern space, full of comfortable seating, and a supremely inviting place for an early supper and a relaxing pint after work. There are even a few oyster shells left on the wall, though (this being 2007) they have been painted off-white and ironised as a design feature.
Best drink Kwak is very popular, mainly because it comes in a funny glass £3.30.
When to go On Saturday nights there's a DJ and much of the seating is moved out to make room for the crowds; seekers of a quiet pint and a sit-down should aim for earlier in the week.
Best seat Anywhere upstairs.
Best snack Bittergarnituur - mixed platters of Dutch snacks to share - are £10.
11 Macclesfield St, W1 (020 7437 2494).
The Blue Posts
A friendly local downstairs, but the upstairs room is this pub's strong point - it's used as an art exhibition space (at the moment you'll find a series of strident anti-war paintings by Robert Druce) and features a combination of comfy sofas and long, workmanlike tables where you can scoff a quick lunch and ponder the legend above the bar, which reads: 'The here, the now through which all future plunges into the past.'
Best drink Duvel, £3.
When to go It's quietest early in the week; there's live music on Sunday evenings.
Best seat Upstairs by the window.
Best snack Homemade seasonal soup and a baguette, £2.75.
28 Rupert Street, W1 (020 7437 1415).
The White Horse
A well-run Sam Smith's establishment with plenty of room at lunchtime. Since the demise of the Lyric and the Red Lion, this is the last remnant of proper drinking in this south-west corner of Soho. Full of Yorkshire people, if you like that sort of thing.
Best drink Sam Smith's Organic Cider, £2.60.
When to go It's round the corner from Shaftesbury Avenue, so ideal for a couple of pre-theatre tipples.
Best seat Sit by the unused fireplace at the foot of the staircase, above you the strangely tall ceiling and its geometric patterned paper make this feel a little like a western saloon bar.
Best snack Potato wedges with sweet Thai sauce, £3.50.
45 Rupert St, W1 (020 7437 5745).
The Star & Garter
Far enough north to feel slightly out of Soho, so refreshingly free of anyone who works in the film industry.
Best drink Bloody Mary, £3.60.
When to go Too small to visit later in the day, so get in bang-on 11am opening.
Best seat In the back lounge, beneath the oval and square mirrors arranged one above the other.
Best snack Pork scratchings, 65p.
62 Poland St, W1.
The Shaston Arms
Pleasingly erratic arrangement of rooms. Sells wonderful beer from the Badger brewery in Dorset.
Best drink Badger ale, £2.60.
When to go The perfect place to while away an afternoon - any later in the day and you're going to have trouble with the narrow stairs down to the toilets - before it fills up at 5.30pm.
Best seat The first booth on the left.
Best snack Spicy spirals, £1.95.
4 Ganton St, W1 (020 7287 2631).
COVENT GARDEN
Cross Keys
In Covenant Garden you have to battle your way into pubs, although in the case of this Endell Street fixture it'll be through the shrubbery. The Cross Keys is probably London's most fascinating pub for bric-a-brac. As well as pop curios, there are miniature portraits of PMs, unattributed Victorian oil paintings, diving helmets, stuffed fish, a brassy privy ... Brian, the owner, is an antiques enthusiast who made the most of Bonhams auctioneers being round the corner (it's now Shellys shoes); his most recent addition is a selection of signed, framed letters by David Beckham.
John Devlin has been landlord for 20 years, having first helped Brian out at The Old Coffee House, Beak Street (signed photos of Lloyd Honeyghan a speciality). The Cross Keys pre-dates him by 140 years, an early arrival on a street that was built as a philanthropic measure to clear the slums. Since then it has hosted market traders, brickmakers and office workers, but has remained more or less the same under Devlin is concerned about how the smoking ban might affect his faithful band of old-timers.
Devlin sees the encroaching chain pubs and style bars as a mixed threat. If they represent competition, they could also drive people seeking a proper drink into the enveloping darkness of this paragon of an old-fashioned pub.
Best drink Harvey's Sussex Best, £2.70.
When to go An early weekday lunch.
Best seat In the far corner, facing away from the distracting telly.
Best snack Doorstep sandwich, £2.50.
31 Endell St, WC2 (020 7836 5185).
Lowlander
This Low Countries bar with a high ceiling is a must for the serious drinker, offering a staggering array of Dutch and Belgian beers.
Best drink The formidable Rochefort 10 Trappist beer, £5.10 per bottle.
When to go Early evening, to secure a couch.
Best seat Couches at the edge of the balcony - settle in and enjoy the table service.
Best snack Olives, £2.50.
36 Drury Lane, WC2 (020 7379 7446).
Freemason's Arms
Shepherds Neame ales, served in quick and friendly fashion, makes this a decent bolthole. Football fact: the FA was founded here.
Best drink Masterbrew, £2.60.
When to go For an England game, to enjoy the sense of history before the inevitable letdown.
Best seat Leather couches at the far end.
Best snack Onion rings or cheesy chips, £2.50.
81-82 Long Acre, WC2 (020 7836 3115).
Naga's Head
The nearest pub to Covent Garden tube so consequently very busy. The 1970s flock wallpaper represents a pleasingly outdated antidote to the stripped pine of many nearby hostelries.
Best drink McMullen's Country Best, £2.90
When to go Weekday afternoons in winter.
Best seat Couches by the window.
Best snack Big bags of peanuts, £1.
10 James St, WC2 (020 7836 4678).
Coach & Horses
The hurling and golf photos at this unobtrusive Irish pub seem a little fuzzy, but that may be just from sampling some of the 70-plus whiskeys.
Best drink 16-year old Lagavulin, £4.
When to go Saturday afternoons.
Best seat Round table by the bar to test your resolve as hot roast beef sizzles nearby.
Best snack Tavern crisps, 50p.
42 Wellington St, WC2 (020 7240 0553).
Maple Leaf
Why not pay this Canadian pub a visit to celebrate the joy of not being American?
Best drink Sleeman's Honey Brown, £3.22.
When to go Canada Day, June 30.
Best seat At the back, in the faux log cabin bit.
Best snack 'Friesa', £1.95.
41 Maiden Lane, WC2 (020 7240 2843).
Porterhouse
Enormous, warren-like boozer offering a wealth of nooks and crannies to settles into before it fills with evening revellers.
Best drink Oyster Stout, £3.20.
When to go Early evening on a weekend.
Best seat Straight on when you get in, down the stairs - no, the other ones ... oh, you'll find it.
Best snack Salty Dog crisps, £1.
1 Maiden Lane, WC2 (020 7379 7917).
Lamb & Flag
Everything about this pub says old. Walls are covered in Punch cartoons. Peer out of the top floor window, and you could in gaslight London.
Best drink Archers Village, £2.70.
When to go Good luck - it's always heaving.
Best seat Upstairs by the window.
Best snack Cornish pasty, £2.50.
Salisbury
It's more towards Leicester Square, but this gorgeous Victorian pub is dripping with hand-carved mahogany, brass lamps and fantastic cut glass. It holds a rare Platinum Award for quality beer from the British Guild of Beer Writers.
Best drink Guest ales currently Old Hooky and St Austell's Tribute, £2.89.
When to go Try Sundays for a quiet pint.
Best seat Along the left hand side of the bar, where the glass and brass effect is at its best.
Best snack Fish and chips, £6.95.
90 St. Martin's Lane, WC2 (020 7836 5863).
FITZROVIA
Fitzroy Tavern
The Fitzroy wears it history with pride. Photos on the wall depict the pub in its heyday, when it was the haunt of the hard-drinking boho locals. Originally named The Hundred Marks, the Fitzroy assumed its more familiar identify in 1919 when it was taken over by Polish immigrant Judah 'Popa' Kleinfeld. It soon became the hostel of choice for the area's more outr£ residents. Augustus John, Jacob Epstein and Aleister Crowley were among the regulators. Nina Hamnett, the Queen of Bohemia, also drank here, trading anecdotes of her adventures with Picasso for drinks.
The pub's reputation as a literary boozer continued until the 1950s: Dylan Thomas, Laurence Durrell, George Orwell and Julian McLaren-Ross were all regulators. In celebration, the downstairs bar is now known as the Writers & Artists Bar, a giveaway that the pub dines out on former glories. It's now a popular haunt for Charlotte Street's more parsimonious advertising crowd; parsimonious because this is a Sam Smith's pub. It's not quite as atmospheric as most of Sam's boozers, but is hugely popular on Thursday and Friday nights when the whole area becomes a heaving (sometimes literally) drinking den.
Best drink Pure Brewed Premier Lager, £2.69.
When to go When you're seeking literary inspiration (there's comedy on Wednesdays).
Best seat Nice wooden booths downstairs.
Best snack KP ready salted peanuts, 60p.
16 Charlotte St, W1 (020 7580 3714).
Bradley's Spanish Bar
Tiny, ramshackle Bradley's is part of the London drinker's rite of passage. Stumble down the staircase and stare at anyone with a seat in a bid to intimidate them into giving up a bit of room. Then get drunk on expensive Spanish lager and sing along to '60s classics on the famous jukebox. Oh, and never, ever go to the toilet. An institution.
Best drink Cruzcampo, £3.20.
When to go You've more chance of finding a seat during the day, but there's a great atmosphere on a Friday night.
Best seat The ground floor, next to the jukebox.
Best snack Pork scratchings, 60p.
42 Hanway St, W1 (020 7636 0359).
Newman Arms
One of Fitzrovia's old-timers, the Newman is famous for featuring in the first murder scene in 'Peeping Toma' and for selling some of London's best pies. It is the pub described by George Orwell in both 'Keep the Aspadistra Flying' and '1984'. A recent refit has tidied up some of its rough edges.
Best drink London Pride, £2.90.
When to go Excellent post-work mainstay.
Best seat Bench seating beneath the window.
Best snack A pie (mutton & barley) is hardly a snack, but they are very good, £8.95.
23 Rathbone St, W1 (020 7636 1127).
Cock Tavern
Excellent pub that's always rammed with tourists, language students and local office workers. The Cock has been impeccably restored (old photos serve as a guide), but draws a younger crows than most Sam Smith's pubs.
Best drink Sam Smith's Wheat Beer, £2.60.
When to go After a hard day's shopping.
Best seat At the back, next to the fireplace.
Best snack Good variety of McCoy's for 60p.
27 Great Portland St, W1 (020 7631 5002).
The Yorkshire Grey
Another Sam Smith's pub, the Grey is slightly cramped, and your decision to settle in will probably depend on whether you nab the right seat. If you do, this boozer's a cozy little hiding place.
Best drink Sam Smith's Bitter, £1.72.
When to go After work on a cold, rainy day.
Best seat The table next to the fire.
Best snack Crisps and peanuts, 60p.
46 Langham St, W1 (020 7636 4788)(.
Crown & Sceptre
Not the most historic pub in the area - a recent refurbishment went for a bar feel over horse-brasses. It's got an attractive horseshoe bar, high ceilings, and a decent wine list. In summer, hordes of drinkers spill outside (though we're not sure of the hygiene implications of perching your pint on the abandoned Victorian toilet out the front).
Best drink Hoegaarden, £3.70.
When to go If you can slip out of work early, bag a table before all the local workers stream in.
Best seat The sofas in the large alcove.
Best snack Wasabi peas, £2.
26-27 Foley St, W1 (020 7307 9971).
Horse & Groom
Easily missed, this Sam Smith's pub is decorated with horse-related paraphernalia. A wooden front bar gives way to a small corridor sporting a dartboard and leading to a cosy snug.
Best drink Old Brewery Bitter, £1.72.
When to go When you can't get a seat at the Cock Tavern down the road.
Best seat In the far corner of the snug bar.
Best snack Chips, £2.
128 Great Portland St, W1 (020 7580 4726).
King & Queen
Proper local pub with an upstairs function room that proudly sports a framed Time Out cover (our '100 Greatest Gigs issue, which celebrated Bob Dylan's 1962 performance here). It's also a rugby pub, but you don't let that put you off; this is an earthy, friendly place that also puts on folk and improv music nights. It's Casque Marked, too.
Best drink St Austell's Tribute, £2.90.
When to go When the rugby's on.
Best seat At the corner of the bar.
Best snack Pork scratchings, 80p.
1 Foley St, W1 (020 7636 5619).
The Ship
Modest pub that neither ignores nor over-plays the nautical theme. Nicely decorated with etched mirrors and brass.
Best drink Bass, £2.80.
When to go Definitely after work.
Best seat Underneath the Wenlock mirror.
Best snack Beans on toast, £2.50.
134 New Cavendish St, W1 (020 7636 6301).
Hope
Small boozer known locally as the 'sausage pub'. Nothing special, but you shouldn't turn your nose up at a nice, quiet place to enjoy a decent pint.
Best drink Timothy Taylor's Landlord, £2.70.
When to go After you've eaten your way into poverty at one of the area's many restaurants.
Best seat Downstairs, by the toilets.
Best snack Not really a snack, but the sausages shouldn't be missed. £5.95 gets you three.
15 Tottenham St, W1 (020 7637 0896).
BLOOMSBURY AND HOLBORN
Princess Louise
Probably London's best-looking pub, the Princess Louise (named after Queen Vic's fourth daughter) was built in 1872, but its spectacular d£cor dates to 1891 and is now 'a monument to the craftsmanship that was taken for granted in the 1890s' one pub guide puts it. There are magnificent mirrors (by Richard Morris of Kensington) and gorgeous mosaics (by Simpsons & Sons of St Martin's Lane), an amazing ceiling and a glorious horseshoe bar. It's worth hunting this gem out as soon as you can - from March it will be closed for a nine-month refurbishment. We're assured that Sam Smith's isn't going to attempt anything drastic, merely return the pub to its original glory as one of London's architectural treasures.
Best drink Sam Smith's Taddy lager, £1.75.
When to go When you want to drink in a cathedral to booze.
Best seat Standing by the fire, resting on the mantelpiece, marvelling at your surroundings.
Best snack McCoy's crisps, 60p.
208-209 High Holborn, WC1 (020 7405 8816).
The Old Crown
Not to be confused with The Crown (a cosy little Sam Smith's joint, just down the road towards Oxford Street), this split level pub is at the smart end of the spectrum but doesn't cross the line into gastropub pretentious nonsense.
Best drink Hit the spirits - the shots list runs to more than 200 varieties, from £2.
When to go Midweek, post-work if you're looking for somewhere lively rather than quite.
Best seat To be honest, if there's a gang of you and you want your own space, it's worth hiring one of the upstairs function rooms - you get your own bar that way.
Best snack There's a range of ciabatta sandwiches, around £5.50.
33 New Oxford Street, WC1 (020 7836 9121).
The Plough
A noisy bar at the back with young people and a fruit machine; a more spacious, traditional pub dining room with old couples, tourists and young men in jumpers at the front. You'll probably want the latter. There's loud music later in the week.
Best drink Of the five quite conventional ales (Bombardier, Abbot, Pride) and usual selection of pub lagers on tap, Pride is the most popular at £2.95 a pint.
When to go If you're a fan, enjoy guaranteed crows when the football's on. Otherwise, avoid.
Best seat See above.
Best snack Pork scratchings, 50p.
27 Museum St, WC1 (020 7636 7964).
Museum Tavern
The current Museum Tavern dates back to 1855 and was originally laid out as five separate bars. Although it was knocked through into one open space in the 1960s, it still retains its historic character. Etched mirrors behind the bar bear the legend 'Watneys Imperial'. Ales are taken seriously: three regulars and three guests. Ales coming up include Bishops Finger, Batemans XXB, Timothy Taylor Landlord, Old Speckled Hen. A good whisky selection too. Not as tourist-heavy as you might expect in spite of being opposite the British Museum. Expect 70:30 in favour of tourists at lunchtime but the reverse in the evenings. Ask if you want to borrow a board game to go with your pint; chefs from the British Museum often come here to wind down over a game of chess.
Best drink Be patriotic with London Pride, £2.73 a pint.
When to go With no jukebox, this is a quieter option for a Friday night.
Best seat There's a cosy corner to the left of the main doors.
Best snack Walkers, Nobby's Nuts and pickled eggs on request, 65p.
49 Great Russell St, WC1 (020 7242 8987).
Queen's Larder
An unpretentious little Greene King pub, situated on the corner of Queen Square, which draws local doctors, lawyers, accountants, professors and a couple of regulars propping up the bar discussing the intricacies of the football league with the landlord. The landlord's ex-wife's collection of clown dolls still grin from above the bar.
Best drink Fruity seasonal ale Fireside was the guest beer when we were in; for a more refreshing session ale, Greene King IPA is £2.70 a pint. We also spotted a bottle of Mars Vodka behind the bar - for those of you with a particularly sweet tooth.
When to go On a summer's evening or a winter's afternoon.
Best seat If you can brave the temperatures, the benches outside on Queen Square. Don't worry, there are braziers.
Best snack Mini Cheddars.
1 Queen Square, WC1 (020 7837 5627).
The Lamb
The Lamb appears in most Londoners' top five favourite pubs, partly for its beers (Young's and, since the merger, Charles Wells), partly for its pies (own-made steak and mushroom, £8.75) and partly for the theatrically inclined Victorian interior which still has the etched-glass snob screens around the mahogany bar, a panelled ceiling and brass balustrades.
Best drink Toast the frost with a Young's Winter Warmer, £2.75 a pint.
When to go Wednesdays and Thursdays are the liveliest and draw a mixed crowd. To get a seat, wait till after the 5-8pm post-work crush.
Best seat Slide on to the green leather banquette in the main bar if you want to soak up the atmosphere.
Best snacks KP nuts, McCoy's, Mini Cheddars, from 50p.
19 Lamb's Conduct, WC1 (020 7405 0713).
Rugby Tavern
A light corner pub off Lamb's Conduit Street, on the corner of Rugby Street, frequented by lawyers and locals. Men in suits lunching on decent comfort food (pork and apple sausages, mash and gravy) kill any earthier pub characteristics, but there are always three Shepherd Neame beers on tap and the round central bar increases your chances of getting served. D£cor is rugby themed and memorabilia includes vintage photos of All Blacks teams from the 1920s. It's closed at weekends and, deceptively from its name, big plasma screen and Antipodean bar staff, it doesn't have Sky Sports. It's up to you to decide whether this is a good thing.
Best drink Easy-drinking Kent's Best £2.50 (or - for the connoisseur - bottles of Shepherd Neame 1698, a stronger, maltier brew).
When to go Weekday lunchtimes.
Best seat Beat the regulars to the snug that's behind the main bar and park yourself on the Chesterfield.
Best snacks Chunky chip butty, £2.95.
19 Great James St, WC1 (020 7405 1384).
The Bountiful Cow
A superb little find in an alleyway off High Holborn, the Bountiful Cow strikes the right balance between stylish bar and careworn boozer. Nothing special from the outside - a corner estate-pub with a neon sign like something from a Chinese restaurant - but the inside is more modish, with wooden banquettes and kitsch film posters on a cowboy theme. A beef-heavy menu is served in the basement dining room, but this pub-diner shows there are more possibilities for an ambitious boozer than a straightforward gastropub makeover.
Best drink Harvey's, £3.
When to go When you've a hankering for some cow.
Best seat Underneath the Ronald Reagan-Barbara Stanwyck poster.
Best snacks Macadamia nuts, £2.85.
51 Eagle St, WC1 (020 7404 0200).
MARYLEBONE
Dover Castle
An old-school delight - all green leather upholstery, thick carpet and old-looking wood.
Best drink Old Brewery Bitter, £1.72.
When to go On a weekend afternoon.
Best seat There's a cosy little side room, or if the weather's unexpectedly good, a small space outside (not big enough to be called a beer garden).
Best snacks Pork scratchings, 45p.
43 Weymouth Mews, W1 (020 7580 4412).
The Feathers
This homely pub claims to be the smallest in London. A refurb hasn't lessened its scruffy charm.
Best drink Flowers Original, £2.75.
When to go Just after work if you can get there.
Best seat If it's not raining, the picnic benches out the front are great for people-watching.
Best snacks Twiglets, 65p.
43 Linhope St, NW1 (020 7402 1327).
Golden Eagle
Lovely, straight-down-the-line pub with a well-kept rotating range of St Austell beers.
Best drink St Austell's Tribute, £2.90.
When to go Tuesday, Thursday and Friday nights when the upright piano gets a run-out.
Best seat Table right at the back.
Best snacks Walkers crisps, 65p.
59 Marylebone Lane, W1 (020 7935 3228).
O'Conor Don
'London's oldest Irish bar' is mercifully free of the usual craic-tat. Wood-panelling, original windows and authentic Guinness memorabilia.
Best drink Guinness, naturally, £3.20.
When to go Mid-afternoon on a weekday.
Best seat Why not prop up the bar?
Best snacks Irish soda bread and butter, 60p.
88 Marylebone Lane, W1 (020 7935 9311).
Windsor Castle
Don't let the full-size Beefeater mannequin put you off - this isn't a tacky tourist magnet but a solid and lively drinking hole.
Best drink Bombardier, £2.80.
When to go Early evening, meeting friends.
Best seat Since it's home to the Handlebar Club, next to the bloke with the most impressive tache.
Best snacks Walkers crisps, 50p.
29 Crawford Place, W1 (020 7723 4371).
Duke of Wellington
The interior is dedicated to all things related to Arthur Wellesley. Weird, but fascinating.
Best drink Adnams, £2.20.
When to go For a sit-down after shopping.
Best seat Tables by the window.
Best snacks Salted peanuts, 50p.
94a Crawford St, W1 (020 7224 9435).
MAYFAIR AND ST. JAMES'S
Guinea Bar
There's a lovely old-school dining room attached to this bar which is, by all accounts, excellent. But we don't care about that - we're here to drink in this superbly atypical pub. The Guinea is a small, wooden-floored room, given over solely to the pleasures of whistle-wetting and talking rubbish. West End drinking, or indeed London daytime drinking, doesn't come any better.
Best drink Young's, Kirin, whatever. It's all good here.
When to go As often as possible. A late lunchtime drink that goes on till around seven would be perfect.
Best seat Third sliver-thin table on left as you come in, up against the gorgeous wood partition.
Best snacks KP dry roasted, 60p.
30 Bruton Place, W1 (020 7499 1210).
The Windmill
The board outside declares it Giles Coren's favourite pub, but don't let that put you off; this place is a boozing oasis, the perfect place to escape the mayhem of the West End shops with a pint and a ponder. It's unashamedly old-school - portraits of superbly sideburned Victorian statesmen line the walls - and there's a faint whiff of 80s kitsch about the cutlery and red napkins on the tables. But the Young's beer is lip-smackingly good which, frankly, is all that really matters.
Best drink Young's Ordinary, £2.60.
When to go Around 6pm on the left as you come in; you can survey the whole room from here.
Best seat First table on the left as you come in; you can survey the whole room from here.
Best snacks Avoid the £3 (£3!) smoked almonds and as for a bag of Tyrrell's crisps, £1.
6-8 Mill St, W1 (020 7491 8050).
Golden Lion
There's been a boozer here since the 1730s and even a resident ghost that is said to haunt the 98 steps to the kitchen. There used to be a door that led directly into a theatre next door; the theatre is long gone, but the upstairs dining room is still called the Theatre Bar.
Best drink Tea - an ale from the Hogsback Brewery, £2.80.
When to go You should get a seat during the week, but since it forms part of the Monopoly pub crawl, look out for drunken board games fans on Saturday afternoons. It's closed Saturday evening and all day Sunday.
Best seat Downstairs on the left, by the stained-glass windows.
Best snacks Roast beef sandwich, £4.50.
25 King St, SW1 (020 7499 1307).
Red Lion
A welcoming sight down a dark alley, this is a pub popular with local workers. Upstairs is a quiet, barless space stuffed with comfy seating and two TVs. The d£cor and bright lighting make it feel more like someone's sitting room than a pub.
Best drink Adnams, £2.90.
When to go Fridays are busiest, so if you're looking for a bit of peace and quiet, go earlier in the week. It's closed on Sundays.
Best seat Upstairs on one of the sofas.
Best snacks Fifteen kinds of sandwiches, £3.
23 Crown Passage, SW1 (020 7930 4141).
Shepherd's Tavern
The cheery staff hanging bunting for Australia Day on our visit set the tone for this unpretentious and welcoming corner pub, hunkered down the quieter end of Mayfair's busy Shepherd's Market. The punters are a varied lot; V-neck-wearing oldies discussing tax returns, a group of young office workers and - jackpot! a solitary man doing the crossword at the bar, all peaceably coexisting amid the Victoriana and wood cladding. Non-smokers should head upstairs.
Best drink Adnams, £2.72.
When to go 3pm on a wet Wednesday with a paper and Sky Sports on the flatscreen.
Best seat Grab yourself a perch on one of the brown leather bar stools at the non-smoking bar.
Best snacks Sweet chilli Nobby's Nuts, 60p.
50 Hertford St, W1 (020 7499 3017).
Red Lion
Tucked away at the end of Charles Street in the kind of spot you'd expect to find relatives of John Profumo buzzing around in Aston Martins, the Red Lion is a hidden gem and an oddly eccentric place, stuffed with Toby jugs, ill-matched furniture and a strange cast of suits and tourists tucking into fish and chips. Still, it works - probably because it gets the simple stuff right; friendly staff, nicely kept ales and a main drinking space with a wonderful womb-like warmth.
Best drink Green King IPA, £2.60.
When to go Ideal for a midweek drink-up.
Best seat In the back bar near the loos.
Best snacks Walkers crisps.
1 Waverton St, W1 (020 7499 1307).
